exploring anxiety
The term “anxiety” has become such a common term for a wide variety of experiences, that it bears redefining with each new person who identifies as “anxious.”
Often, there are specific sensations and physical experiences associated with anxiety. Some common ones include:
feeling dizzy
numbness or tingling
churning stomach
increased breathing
racing heart
sweating
muscle tension
brain fog
feeling scattered
what else would you add from your experience?
Sometimes we’re aware of these sensations, to various degrees; sometimes we’re not. (There are biological reasons for many of the “symptoms” on this list, and I love exploring lived-experience from a physiological perspective - but I’ll save that for another post!)
If we step outside of the realm of labels and pathology, we can move closer toward understanding your unique experience of anxiety. How do you know you’re feeling anxious? What is enlivened in you when you’re in this experience? When do you notice these sensations/thoughts/feelings that you’ve come to know as anxiety? Answering these question invites you to cozy up to your specific experiences of anxiety in a supportive environment such as a therapy session or conversation with someone you trust. This process of curiosity and inquiry supports you to build awareness around your experience, rather than trying to manage or remove “symptoms.”
If you’ve been told “you’re too sensitive,” or you worry about what your body sensations mean (usually it’s something bad), you may have learned to distrust your body or distance yourself from your felt-experience (sensations, thoughts, feelings, etc.).
When we close ourselves off from our sensations, we limit ourselves, our experience, our wholeness.
At certain times in our lives, it may have been very important not to feel. Our sensations may have been denied, ignored, or the meaning distorted by the significant adults in our lives, and so we may have misattributed feelings or meaning to sensations, or stopped feeling altogether.
As an adult, you get to choose how you associate the sensations you’re experiencing. You get to decide how you make meaning of your felt-experience. You get to choose what to be awake to in yourself.
Our sensations are messengers carrying important information. If you’ve always associated your churning stomach with “I’ve done something wrong/I’m a bad person,” there might be a new meaning to uncover. Maybe your churning stomach is sending you an important message that you’ve had enough of a situation or relationship, and that it’s time to make a change.
When we hang in with sensation and pay attention to our embodied experience, for the moment not trying to change or fix the sensation, often we can connect to the important knowing underneath.
Thank you to Ambrose Kirby for his wise words and inspiration around wholeness and embodiment.
